Growing up too fast

I love Nelly Furtado and her music - especially her song "Promiscuous," but while watching the music video I couldn't help but cringe at the influence this video will have on today's youth.

Girls as young as 13 years old are tuning into media like this on a daily basis, and then going out and mimicking these artists. Now I'll admit to trying to dance like these women in the video, but little girls DO NOT need to be clones of celebrities considerably older than them.

By showing this video in venues all over the country it's almost as if our culture is encouraging young girls and boys to behave this.  I thought our country was trying to establish an independent and free spirit for women. The line "but if I get lonely, I'ma need your help" harshly contradicts this.  We do not need to emphasize that a woman can only be happy in a man's company.

Second, the thought of my little neighbor grinding all up on some stranger, in a midriff-baring cleavage-popping top is not acceptable.  If we keep showing club scenes like this to our younger generation, they are going to grow up assuming this is the way everyone behaves, and they must dress like tramps, dance like strippers, and mercifully tease and flirt with old, strange men. 

The best example I can think of is in the movie "Mean Girls" when Regina's sister is seen copying Shakira's dance moves while an out-of-control spring break trip rolls in the background. As the movie flashes to another scene, you can see the child proudly lift up her shirt and expose her chest to the college fans on the TV screen. The mom simply stands by without even being phased by her daughter's obscene actions. 

When my neighbor became a freshman in high school, I had just finished my first year at college. I returned home loaded down with clothes that no longer fit me, or were out of style. Rather than donating them, I decided to give the more age-appropriate pieces to Kristin. As she browsed through my old clothing, she came across a somewhat sleazy blue sequin dress that I had no intention of getting rid off. She immediately fell in love with it and went to try it on. When she emerged from my closet the length was fine, but the neckline scooped down nearly to her bellybutton.  She loved it. Begged to keep it.  She was a freshman in high school.  Wearing that dress would either cause her father to have a heart attack, her brother to commit his first murder, of her indefinite suspension from school.  I never found out which one came first. It took her nearly a week to get over the fact that dress was just too old for her.

If we expect those younger than us to aspire to successful and well respected people then we need to reevaluate how we are portraying the American culture.

Like I said I love this song and artist, but I also have the maturity to know when I have crossed the line in how I behave.  Young women want to be noticed and appreciated - now we just need to make sure it's for the right reasons.